Front Page

Gold Bricks

Gold is considered the holiest of materials, though not the rarest, and has been since the beginning of civilization. It is very nonreactive (it's a noble metal) and as such can stand up to the might of the elements (nobody wants their temple to fall down).

Bingo

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sti men eri ape ted
atte rai her tal otio

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Famous Heroes

Melina 160th-level adventurer, member of the “Guild Name” guild, with the motto “Keleios’s alt”, stands at the 76th position in the pantheon of Survival under the vigilant supervision of the god Stan The Man. All she ever wanted was the world.

Ponyets 150th-level adventurer, member of the “Blue Feather” guild, with the motto “Don't Panic!”, stands at the 117th position in the pantheon of Destruction under the vigilant supervision of the god The Insidious One. He's asking someone to bring a cutting remark to a punfight and report the results via express mail.

Wanted

Ecologists warn that the Displeasurebot population has declined by ninety percent. Let's see if we can help get it to a hundred today.

Caught today: 247 pcs.

Security Chimera is wanted for knowing too much. Or maybe it's too little. Either way, the reward is a worthy reward.

Caught today: 266 pcs.

Guild Spotlight

DemiGods is a group of 21 brave adventurers, who have climbed to the 32nd position in the pantheon of Adventure. Elders call themselves “legend”. If this guild were a settlement, then Next Station would be its sister town.

Watchmen is where 14 heroes come together to brag about their 63rd place in the pantheon of Popularity. The highest rank here is “guardian”. Traders in Egopolis have started a betting pool on which guild plan will backfire next. Evil Monkey declined to comment on its relation with this guild. Their recruitment posters consistently misspell the word 'guild' in creative ways.

Guild popularity in

11% — Blue Feather

10% — Harvest Moon

5% — Ankh-Morpork City Watch

3% — Knights who say Ni

2% — First Pantheon of Progres...

2% — Guild Name

1% — Yeti Seekers

1% — Unleashed

1% — Kiss my axe

64% — (other guilds)

Buy and Sell

Callie666 seeks her childhood golden cinder block and is buying any brought to “Triple Six Goods” until it's found.

Found today: 99 pcs.

Limited supply of a unicoin and high level of demand are causing prices to soar. Sell now, sell high!

Found today: 101 pcs.

Ads

Lost: Arin Aensland's marbles. If found, please return.
The “ARM to Hand” guild is looking for a supplier for a pot of gold paint.
Overwhelmed with your side job? For the contents of your wallet we make it disappear and get you a new one soon!

Daily Forecast

• Astrologers proclaimed a holiday and flatly refused to give a forecast.

Godpower Cap

27%

Ideabox News

• 33 ideas were voted on in the Ideabox since the last issue of this newspaper.

WardPhoenix has been judging all your ideas — those in the Ideabox and fashion choices too.

• Spend enough time around Fistantiuls and his ideas just might rub off on you.

Forum News

12:15 [Game] The Person Above Me

11:08 Free Word Association Game

10:58 Fun word game!

10:52 Random Spam

18:35 Count as high as possible!

Broken News

• Research shows that explaining jokes causes them to die a miserable death.

• Did you know that for every lightning bolt thrown in the arena, Great Random kills a squirrel?

• Monsters once again held a demonstration near the gates of Monstro City. Leading the opposition, a Rocky Raccoon took the podium and demanded liberty, equality and fraternity. Authorities presented their counterargument in the form of vats brimming with boiling tar, thus putting an end to the rally.

Market Quotes

1 bosscoin

12278 gold coins +2.9%

1 Godville invite

939 gold coins -4.5%