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Tradeburg

The bustling port city of Tradeburg is located in the center of several trade routes, making it an ideal melting pot of cultures from different lands. Merchants from this town often travel widely, seeking exotic items to sell to their varied clientèle.

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Famous Heroes

Harei 137th-level adventurer, member of the “OG Family” guild, with the motto “I live to die! ”, stands at the 78th position in the pantheon of Arkeology under the vigilant supervision of the god Katan. Distinctive features: a reckless disregard for danger, and an incredibly high pain threshold caused by repeated exposure to blunt objects.

Witchking 138th-level adventurer, member of the “Harvest Moon” guild, with the motto “For Death Eternal!”, stands at the 156th position in the pantheon of Might under the vigilant supervision of the god God-of-Fear. He is deeply gratified by his place in the pantheon and is not planning to give it up any time soon.

Wanted

A Wrecking Bull is running amok and stealing candy from babies — will no one stop the madness?

Caught today: 55 pcs.

An intolerably rich tycoon from Madchester is offering a reward for every Cannon Bull anyone brings in. Indulge him before he changes his mind.

Caught today: 43 pcs.

Guild Spotlight

Honnōji Academy is a guild ranked 41st in the pantheon of Duelery, consisting of 25 heroes and heroines. Veterans in this guild call themselves “quantum”. Quantum Butterfly declined to comment on its relation with this guild. The members of this guild are only mildly rowdy while in public.

RideTheLightning is a guild ranked 89th in the pantheon of Unity, consisting of 29 heroes and heroines. They call themselves “headbanger”. Can you imagine that? The guild's unity increases with dropping temperature.

Guild popularity in

8% — Blue Feather

3% — 404

3% — Beer

2% — Shadow Wizard Money Gang

2% — Azure Lavinrac

2% — Arbitrary Legends

2% — smooooch・∀・

2% — Ankh-Morpork City Watch

2% — 42 - THE answer!

74% — (other guilds)

Buy and Sell

“Caveat Emptorium” now has wider aisles, brighter lights, and shopping carts. Bring in a quantum mechanism to help Ilev Hawkstar pay for the renovation.

Found today: 31 pcs.

It seems an emotional randomizer makes a perfect hiding place for a trader's soul. There's a great deal of money to be had from shopkeepers searching for redemption.

Found today: 32 pcs.

Ads

The Unpleasantville Customs Dept is offering a strong staff at a 70 percent discount. Drop by the guard booth near the city gates.

Sale! 50% off on all catnip at your local pet store! Hurry before it's gone!

Not a Big Dealer puppies for sale! Temperamental, vaccinated and housebroken. Lineage is uncertain, but their sire is believed to have been referenced in this newspaper quite often.

Daily Forecast

• Astrologers are not sure why, but today every accumulator charge restores 70% of godpower.

• Strong interference in the higher layers of the atmosphere is negatively affecting temples’ abilities. Astrologers affirm that conversion of gold coins into experience is virtually impossible today.

Godpower Cap

4%

Ideabox News

• Got any ideas? Send them in — there were only 47 ideas suggested yesterday.

• Looking for Me3713? He is in the ER, helping his divine peers.

Pam Not Pan is doing her part to make Godville even wackier. Everyone be grateful, and be warned.

Forum News

01:37 Crossword & KYM Hints

00:10 Interesting coincidences

00:06 [Game] The Person Above Me

23:37 Acronym game

23:26 Count as high as possible!

Broken News

• See our exclusive interview with the Godville Admin on the second page. It's a must-read!

• The mark of a true hero is their ability to use white-out to fix a blackout on their first attempt.

• The heroes of the “Be More Feegle!” guild staged a raid upon the sewers of Unsettlement. They returned wet, angry, and covered in algae.

Market Quotes

1 bosscoin

16814 gold coins +3.6%

1 Godville invite

900 gold coins -3.5%