Hero

Gravatar

Frank Zapa

level 82

⚡SHOCK'N ROLL, BABY!⚡

Age 4 years 11 months
Personality neutral
Guild no guild
Monsters Killed about 187 thousand
Death Count 55
Wins / Losses 341 / 311
Temple Completed at 07/19/2019
Ark Completed at 10/07/2020 (172.2%)
Twos of Every Kind 369m, 344f (34.4%)
Savings 6M, 661k (22.2%)
Pet Double dragon Nipper

Equipment

Weapon shard of death metal +91
Shield self-portrait +91
Head lion's mane +91
Body vacuum pack +92
Arms spiral galaxy arm +91
Legs steelettos +91
Talisman portrait of the president +91

Skills

  • eye scream level 67
  • slap of the whale level 60
  • poisoned kiss level 57
  • lossy compression level 56
  • selfish interest level 55
  • tooth sampling level 54
  • unbearable boredom level 52
  • brain dilution level 47
  • steel finger level 45
  • pseudopod attack level 37

Pantheons

Might11587
Templehood30711
Gladiatorship1004

Achievements

  • Honored Invincible
  • Honored Renegade
  • Animalist, 1st rank
  • Builder, 1st rank
  • Favorite, 1st rank
  • Shipwright, 1st rank
  • Champion, 2nd rank
  • Dueler, 2nd rank
  • Fiend, 2nd rank
  • Freelancer, 2nd rank
  • Hunter, 2nd rank
  • Martyr, 2nd rank
  • Raider, 2nd rank
  • Savior, 2nd rank
  • Careerist, 3rd rank
  • Moneybag, 3rd rank
  • Seadog, 3rd rank

Hero's Chronicles

3 March, 2019
Day 1

11:43 What happened? Where am I? Is this a temple? How did I get here?

Lvl 5 – 1st brick – 37 monsters slain – 0 deaths

15:56 Told the plumber his princess was in another castle. He begged me not to tell her where he was.
My quest to tell the plumber that his princess is in another castle was a complete success. Got a slightly scuffed golden brick as a reward. I think I’d better use this brick in the back corner of the temple.

Took him fishing for first time, already want to drown him.
18:34 Oooh, someone’s left a fishing rod behind… Let’s see if I can put it to good use.
18:43 A fishing inspector jumped out of the bushes, fined me 512 gold coins and advised me to switch to photo hunting.

Day 2

07:52 I appreciate your attempt to lessen my burden, Mighty One, but three thousand coins and one gold brick weigh the same, don’t you think?

_Lvl 8 – 6 bricks – 145 monsters slain – 0 deaths

12:12 Was rewarded with a golden brick for killing a wanted monster. Post-mortem Artist, rest in peace.

12:18 I think “🌩️I’m shocked🌩️” is a great motto — sounds proud and elegant.

22:04 Successfully completed yet another quest. Man, I’m good at this.
My quest to increase the quest total by one was completed with excellence. Got a shiny golden brick and felt great about it.

23:36 Overcome by the Heffalump, I boldly told it “I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.” Well, next life it is then.

Day 3

_Lvl 10 – 13 bricks – 366 monsters slain – 1 death – duels 0/1

19:20 Spotted what looked like a duck and quacked like a duck, but on closer inspection turned out to be a Ravenous Bugblatter Beast. I sense a fight looming.

10:47 The Giga Byter was used up for gold and experience! Time to return to my heroic deeds.

Day 4

Lvl 10 – 41 bricks – 483 monsters slain – 1 death – duels 4/1

18:02 The Beermonger was triumphantly defeated! I’ve gained more experience and looted some gold, but it’s time to return to my heroic deeds.

20:19 Just encountered a Full Metal Jackrabbit selling bootleg ’🌩️I’m shocked🌩️’ T-shirts. It shall pay dearly for this trademark violation!

Champion, 3rd rank

22:24 Miss No Life was removed from my potential threats list. She will remember not to stand in my way again.

08:44 I heard about a god who allows one day out of seven to rest. Can we discuss my working hours, Almighty? They seem a little excessive. Sure! Come into my office.

08:45 Time to get back to my mission.

Day 5

Lvl 11 – 58 bricks – 654 monsters slain – 1 death – duels 7/1

19:02 Breathed in. Breathed out. I’m running out of things to write in my diary…

Hunter, 3rd rank

10:20 The Vertigoat was used up for gold and experience! Time to return to my heroic deeds.

Day 6

Invincible, 3rd rank

12:26 Hercules Boy has been defeated. And so it will be with all the others.

Lvl 12 – 77 bricks – 868 monsters slain – 1 death – duels 11/1

Day 7

Favorite, 3rd rank

Lvl 12 – 91 bricks – 1008 monsters slain – 1 death – duels 14/2

18:57 I didn’t even make it halfway through my confessions before the priest ran out screaming. The other priests are drawing straws over who has to listen to me next.

Day 9

_Lvl 13 – 125 bricks – 1475 monsters slain – 1 death – duels 18/3

09:44 I keep getting the feeling that I’m an 8-bit hero in a 16-bit world.

… … … … … … … … … … … …

Yada. Yada. Yada.

FASTEST NON-PAYING TEMPLE 76 days