“Dear reader, please know that hero Sir Vente is busy doing his Lord’s bidding (half reluctantly) and comes here to provide updates when he can. Now then, I hope that you enjoy these entertaining and wistful tales that have been etched into this digital chronicle. And without further ado…”
﹏﹏ BIOGRAPHY ﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
Name: Sir Vente
Name etymology: sirvente
[English: ser-vent; French: seer-vahnt]
- a medieval poem or song of a heroic or satirical character, as composed by a troubadour
- Naun’s servent
- a sight for sore eyes (Okay, maybe not quite.)
Current Occupation: Local Hero
Previous Occupation, back home: Travelling Bard
Home: The Village of Balandor; World of Andara
Favorite food: Gummy Wyrms
﹏﹏ ORIGIN & HISTORY ﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
Sir Vente grew up in a little village near the greater cliffs of Ahlmeia, the village of Balandor. Outside of Godville of course, in the world of Andara. It’s currently a mystery as to how Sir Vente arrived in Godville, but he’s piecing together the what’s, the who’s, through the booze. His father, Farid, was the personal tailer of his Lordship Montgomery, (clearly where he gets his fashion taste ). His mother, Aoelin, was the village’s herbalist (must be where he gets his addictive personality – No, not THAT kind of herb, geesh ). All Sir Vente ever wanted to do in life was to play music for folks and make his family happy.
﹏﹏ PROLOGUE ﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
Sir Vente awoke with quite a stir, and also with quite the headache. His eyes opened, he rubbed his noggin and he peered about. “Where the hell…” Then in a brief moment of clarity, he thought The evermore crystal had done it, had to be…
﹏﹏ CHRONICLES ﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
2015/12/20 “First Day”
“What happened? Where am I? Is this a temple? How did I get here?”
Sir Vente picks up some dusty old journal (or diary as Godville Admins like to call it), rips out all the old pages, throws them to the wind and begins to scribe his tales…
Dear diary No, no, too girly! Dear whomever finds these chronicles, I hope you’re willing to do me an honest favor. See to it that you read these pages and if they end abruptly, come find me and HELP ME OUT!! I’ll have most likely been taken captive, been eaten by a Grayscaled Dragon, or fallen in a deep pit. Just follow the trail and you’ll find me there. For your efforts I’ll consider sharing my savings; depending on how far gone I am that is… Medical bills are expensive these days!”
Sir Vente, continuing to scribe… “Next entry!” Flips a page
2015/12/20 “Psychosis? Yeah, that’s it…”
- The god Naun spoke: “Oh, Sir Veeeente. Hope you’re doing well. I have a little task fooor youuuu.”
- Sir Vente, looking around: “Uhhhhh, okay.”
- Naun: “You will build me a temple.”
- Sir Vente, still looking around: “Okay, who’s there? This is a joke, right?”
- Naun: “Nope.”
- Sir Vente thinks: I’m going crazy
- Naun: “No you’re not. I summoned you here.”
- Sir Vente: “How’d you hear my th-”
- Naun: “No matter! Go forth and get to work. I’ll look after you, you needn’t worry.”
- Sir Vente: Great, I’m hallucinating here. What’s next?
- Sir Vente: “Whoa!! Okay! Okay, you’re real. Geeeesh.”
- Naun: “GO!”
“Whelp, ‘suppose I should get going and start this quest; lest I want another bolt of lighting to the arse! I’ll figure out how I got here along the way. More importantly, WHERE here actually is.”
The lady walking ahead of me sped up so I did too. She started running so I ran too. Then she screamed so I screamed as well. I never even saw what we were running from.
“Principles DO have a price”
Told the trader I wouldn’t part with the really priceless gift at any price on principle. Made 28342 gold coins profit from selling both my principles and the really priceless gift.
2015/12/29 “Joining his very first guild”
Joined the Emerald Sky guild. “They seem nice and charismatic.” Eyes widen “Ooooh, AND they have cookies!” * Walking briskly to the sign-up board, knocking people over *
“Looking for Love”
I’ve been feeling so lonely lately that I decide to set up a kissing booth in the town square, with me as the main attraction. Any minute now an eager crowd of smoochers should begin to form. Any minutes now… Any minute…
“His first skill”
Saadak taught me a special skill that he said no one else knows, called “asynchronous swimming” and swore me to secrecy. I’m not entirely sure what “secrecy” means, but I can’t wait to show everyone at the tavern.
“Start of a beautiful friendship”
Cupil, the Talking Donkey, tried to head butt me off the road. Instead, he tripped and ended up stumbling in front of me! We both belt out laughing and decided to give adventuring together a go.
Trying to find a good time to tell Cupil that he’s adopted.
“Brush with Death”
Passed by a creepy, black-cloaked dude on a black horse. Gave him directions to wherever he wanted to go in exchange for 9 coins.
Heard a slow clap emanate from the heavens. Thanks a lot, Great One.
“Seedy Side of Town”
Just strolling through Godville and noticed a sign outside a tavern that read: “Gentlemen: No shoes, no shirt, no service! Ladies: No shoes, no shirt, no problem!”
2016/05/12 “Naun’s Temple Complete” [143 Days woot]
My face must be glowing like this golden temple I just now finished for you, Luminous One. I have to say, it does look great!
2015/05/12 “New Adventures…”
- Sir Vente: “Hey Lord? You around?”
After a moment shuffling can be heard above
- The god Naun clears his throat: “Yes? …Ohhhh! Would you look at that, you’ve done it! What a miraculous temple. Great job, little one!”
- Sir Vente: “Shiny enough?”
- Naun: “It’s resplendent!”
- Sir Vente, beaming: “Phew! I thought you might go and request another level or some extra spires maybe.”
- Naun, pondering: Hmm
- Sir Vente realizing his mistake: “Ahh crud.”
- Naun: “No, no, it’s wonderful. Keep it as is.”
- Sir Vente: “Thank you! Oh thank you. Do you have any idea what it took to… Oh riiiight, all those bolts of lightning and terrible things were from YOU. Gee thanks.”
- Naun: “No problem slick!” If only he knew what it took on MY end.
A brief moment of silence between the two…
- Sir Vente sheepishly starts: “Sooo Almighty, I was hoping now that your temple is all finished, that I might be able to sqeeda…”
- Naun cuts in: “Riiiight, well you see here little one, I’m in the market for an Ark; don’t ask me WHY? But you’re on such a roll and just look at you, you’re so capable!!”
- Sir Vente, mouth agape: Oh. My. God.
- Naun: “So hop to it! The flood’s a comin’!!”
Sir Vente trods off, grumbling to himself
2016/07/17 “Sad day. Cupil bit the dust!”
The Holy Mass Murderer raised its hand for a deadly final strike against me, when Cupil suddenly threw himself under its feet. The monster stumbled and fell dead on the ground, its neck broken. Cupil was knocked out by the impact of the monster’s carcass. Oh, my Lord, if I don’t bring him back to his senses in time, he’ll lose all his levels and his will to compete!
“The Disastrous Dungeon of Doom!!”
My Lord, how I tried. The four zombified adventurers I was paired with were of no use at all. Handling those three hulking bosses was absolutely awful! The last one was simply too much. Thank you for trying so hard to help. Cupil will live still, I promise!
2016/07/19 “Glorious day! Cupil was revived!”
A high priest rolled up his sleeves and slapped Cupil, instantly bringing my beloved talking donkey back to consciousness! At least, I think he was a priest… Paid him 9582 gold coins anyway. Oh Cupil, how I’ve missed you!
Admitted to the doctor that I’d been pretending that I don’t drink. He took it well, then confessed that he’d been pretending to be a doctor.
- Sir Vente: “Did that count as my yearly physical at least?”
﹏﹏ FROM the GOD NAUN ﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
Oh, reader, you’re still here! I’m glad you’ve come this far. Thanks for checking in on my dear little Sir Vente. I love him so. And I hope that you have a little piece of love for him too.
Well, merry met and I wish you all the best! Be well…Ciao!