I have no idea what’s going on.
So three days in – I have died once and yet vanquished many strange and wonderful foes.
My god is kind, though a bit…talkative. We shall see how we continue to get along. The nights are the worst – she is quiet unto death and I oddly find myself missing her divine voice.
Each day brings new surprises. Bring it on, I say.
Goddess is…rejoice.
Oh, peachy. Hungry Tribbles. They’re cute and they purr, but Goddess, they do like to get it on.
It’s the 15th of May – the day I received the Hero of the Day award. I’m surely the only one to possess it today. I’m positive. Absolutely confident. It must be so….
Today is 3 February in The Year of the Lachrymating Leveret (2022) and I’m in the news!
Shadowcat — 60th-level adventurer, member of the “Ankh-Morpork City Watch” guild, with the motto “Ye Gods and Little Fishes”, stands at the 5th position in the pantheon of Storytellers under the vigilant supervision of the goddess Mattygroves. She always wanted to recruit a team for the next epic quest, but never found the time
A portrait of my heroine (and her pet)
An AI generated portrait of Shadowcat and her (currently arked) pet
………………………………………………….
Kat Gains a Shadow
Part 1 – Her Life Before Godville – Kat is mightedly confused
Busy Bees agency
Brings you its worker bees
They’re as happy as can be
Working hard, you will see
Another week, another hideously twee team meeting, Kat thought. Each week, without fail, Matty insisted on singing her self-penned company jingle. Kat struggled to keep her disgust off her face. She failed.
“Are we grumpy today, Kat? Turn that frown upside down,” Matty twittered in a squeaky, sing-song voice. “We’re all happy Busy Worker Bees here!!!!”
After the meeting, Kat groaned quietly when Matty came to her desk. She typed furiously hoping Matty would get the hint, but sadly, and as always, her tactic failed.
“Don’t let the fog get you down!! It may be glum outside but it’s always sunny at Busy Bees!!” Matty trilled.
“Matty, I’m not a child, please stop treating me like one. What’s up?”
Finally, Matty dropped her voice into something approximating a normal register. “They’re predicting disruption on the trains because of this fog. I’m leaving early – do you want a lift?”
Kat knew Matty meant well. In truth, Ms Matty Groves ran a successful employment agency right by the river in Brentford. Brentford is nothing special, but the river views are nice…when you can see them. The fog truly was thickening, the windows looked as if they’d been painted over with industrial metal grey paint.
Kat stamped down on her annoyance, smiled and said, “Thanks Matty, I’d really appreciate that.”
“OK,” Matty squeaked, “GREAT! I’ll swing by at the end of the day!!!” Matty bounced off, like a hyperactive Tigger.
The fog thickened. Kat didn’t think that was possible but now it looked like slate-grey cotton candy. Kat only knew Matty was walking next to her by the constant chatter – often in rhyme – from her left. The fog even seemed to dampen sounds – she could no longer hear the sounds of the traffic on the high street or the river flowing where she knew it had to be. Kat was almost glad of Matty’s inane conversation. It was the only thing that reassured her that the world was still there.
“Ye Gods and little fishes!!! What the heck is that?!!?!” Kat whipped her head around to try to spot what her boss was on about. Her heart leapt. Matty NEVER used anything even approximating swear words so obviously something was desperately wrong.
Silence descended. The world was wrapped in fog and all Kat could see was her own shadow. Huh?! Kat could see her shadow in the cotton candy floss that shrouded Brentford High Street…indeed the world.
She looked down. Sure enough, her shadow was there. It was odd and misshapen but definitively THERE.
“Matty?” Kat reached out and could feel….nothing. Matty was gone. The WORLD was gone. There was nothing but mist and shadow and silence.
She forced herself to breathe and not to run. Her heart raced but she plodded on following her Shadow. The Shadow (Kat couldn’t help but think the capital S) led her onward for what seemed like hours but probably wasn’t.
As she walked on (resisting the urge to run, to flee, to panic) her Shadow seemed to elongate. A dim light appeared. It occurred to Kat that something was odd, then it hit her. The light was in front of her – she was indeed heading toward it. Yet her Shadow too pulled her forward, heading towards the dim, grey light. That shouldn’t be possible, Kat realised.
“YE GODS AND LITTLE FISHES!” The upbeat sing song voice echoed through the void.
“I see a Kat
Oh, fancy that!
Her shadow at that,
My lovely Shadowcat!!!”
Kat could tell by the exclamation marks that Matty was somewhere…or everywhere. She emerged from the fog and found she could finally see not only her shadow but her body. Her surprisingly muscular body. Her surprisingly muscular NAKED body. Uh oh. Something was clearly very, very wrong.
To be continued….?