Part 1: My Creation
. The start of my life is, so I have been told, not that uncommon in recent years. I was created by a god named Jordayne who, in his wisdom (or, as I suspect, impatience), created me as an adult. The only thing I remember about my birth, such as it was, is a giant voice booming at me saying, “I am Jordayne and you are my champion. I will call you Elarris.” Yes, I know it is an odd name, but it seemed better not to question the giant voice in the sky since, it seemed, I already had quite the instinct for self-preservation. Jordayne got some things right at least.. So there I was, fully developed and filled with life. Everything was new and fun and simple. Figures that my god wasn’t done giving orders yet… “Now my champion you must know your purpose. You shall go on mighty adventures and collect golden bricks for use in constructing a majestic temple dedicated to me.” I probably would have obeyed him no matter what, seeing how I literally owed him my life, but he sent down a special thing, no, the greatest thing in the world. Beer!
Part 2: Getting a Job
postponed indefinitelyPart ?: Ark Completed at Last
07:24 A log! A thousandth log! I’m even ready for a flood now. Not that I’m asking for it, Great One. After managing to make space for a new dimension so quickly, I’ve got a pile of wooden ark planks and 7381 coins as a bonus.
Part ? + 1: Pets Old and New
. I had finally finished my lifelong dream of building an ark. I don’t know when it became a lifelong mission considering I had only been building it for about a year, but a lifelong mission it was! This meant I could finally stop paying for flood insurance. It also meant that my two and a half year romp with my beloved sparky was over. At the ripe old age of level 59 he had seen better days and was in need of retirement. We had been through many adventures together and he will always be my best friend, but the time had come for his long vacation. I dropped him off at the ark and promised I would visit him as often as I could.
. It was time to tame a new pet. I’ll admit that I had been out of the game for a long time and wasn’t quite sure how I would know the right monster when I saw him. It turns out that I got very lucky. I happened across a small Vengeful Mole being picked on by a group of his peers. They were laughing at his glasses and trying to convince him that monsters could not become Nuclear Physicists and that he was a fool for loving science. That was the point that I sneezed and accidentally got the attention of the bullies. Yeah I’m a master of stealth, right? Let me tell you in that fight I was explosive… Literally! I spontaneously combusted leaving a dead group of monsters lying strewn around me.
. So there I was, freshly exploded and facing a Vengeful Mole. I thought I was going to be in for another big fight. Apparently though, if you suddenly explode yourself in front of a wannabe Nuclear Physicist he thinks you are a god in hero form. The Vengeful Mole threw himself at my feet and begged that I take him along. “Well,” I thought to myself, “it couldn’t hurt to take a monster along who clearly is smarter than me.” Pulled a collar out of my pocket and named him Scrat… At least, I tried to name him that…. . “Scrat?!” boomed the voice of my deity. “No! I’m taking the reins on this one. His name shall be Mole-ecule!” I looked at my new pet for support, saw the spark of joy in his eyes and knew I was outvoted. Ok fine, Molecule it is!
. It’s kind of crazy how much my Lord loves Molecule. I’ve heard that he has been bugging other deities about how proud he is of the name. There is also a rumor floating around about a baby book filled with things like Molecules first level and first dungeon…. I didn’t even get anything like that. Seriously I had to make this whole chronicle myself because Jordayne wouldn’t do it!