Weeeeee!
runs around flailing his hands above his hands
Suddenly a thunder crashes. Single bolt of lightning fell from the clear skies. Rumbling, it hit the poor fellow on the green fields. He fell on the ground, his fate unknown.
After some time his eyes opened. He straightened himself up, smoke still rising from his body. Suddenly, clouds parted and shining ray of light shined on him. A thuderous voice roared:
“From today onwards, you will be known as a hero of Immortal Condor, your one and only divinity! Your name is now Hell Reject! Go and spread your faith trought the world!”.
The newborn hero blinked twice and stared in daze as the clouds connected once more.
Few seconds later clouds sundered again, and voice roared:
“And build me a golden temple! With none less than 1000 golden bricks!”.
Hero quickly got up and started to travel around the world. He feared no foe nor perilous dangers, because he now knew that now there is always someone watching over him. Even if he dies. Even if big bad monsters make fun of his silly equipment or he spends all his money on beer. Immortal Condor would always be with him and facepalm over his decisions.