My name is Boleyn. My goddess has told me that I come from a long line of greatness. She has never explained but I’ve learned to take her word for these things. She blessed me with the motto RAISED MOST HIGH. At first I was unsure about this but I now see it as a great honor. I’m sorry, I need a drink.
PARDON ME BUT BOLEYN IS VERY YOUNG SO I FEEL, AS HER CREATOR, THE NEED TO FILL IN THE GAPS FOR HER. SHE OF COURSE WILL NOT BE ABLE TO READ MY WORDS. SHE HAS BEEN A HEADSTRONG BUT CAPABLE HEROINE. SHE HAS FOUGHT, DIED, PERHAPS LOVED, AND PRAISED. SHE HAS ALSO LOST, LEARNED, AND DISOBEYED. SHE IS YOUNG AND I HOPE SHE WILL GROW
That’s better. I haven’t been the greatest in the arena and the loss of gold has been trying. But my skills are growing. In my short life I have collected 25 gold bricks for my Lady. I already have plans for her temple. I am a proud member of the Knights who say Ni. Now I am trying to come in second in a beauty pagent. I only hope I don’t win that would not make my Lady proud. My throat is dry. I think the tavern is calling.
So much better. I am now trying to find out who sends me on these quests. I know it is not Iduna because she often yells at me to stop what I’m doing. She can be quite insistent and overbearing. I did not just say that. She is going to kill me dead. Of course after she gets over it she will hopefully ressurect me. I’m hungry.
I recently acquired the strike of the rabbit skill and have been putting it to good use. I also have a lot of friends who help me, or at least try to. Hopefully I’ve been as helpful to them.
I feel I must apologise for this shameful and brazen attempt to win your vote.
Well I found out who sends us on quests, unfortunately I can’t remember who it is. I think all this fighting is going to my head. I just replaced mile marker 100. Now I’m finding the page that can’t be found. NI!!!
I just passed my 25th day birthday. I don’t see it as very significant but Iduna did so I guess it is. I’ve collected 31 gold bricks for her. I’m sorry but I am very tired.
Right now I am on a quest to rehearse a speech for world domination. I don’t think Iduna is very happy with me. If it weren’t for my friends I would have died.
I have to say that it is her friends I have been thinking of as I try and help her make more.
I found out what Victoria’s Secret was but I can’t seem to remember what it was. It must have been all that beer. I have gotten 50 bricks for my goddess. She seemed happy, I was but she was ecstatic. I’m lonely.
So get a pet!
I’ve gained a new skill a very powerful sneeze. Right now I’m on a quest to get to know Charon the ferryman. I’ve died in the process. You’d think that would be good enough but evidently not.
Well I got to know Charon. He wasn’t a very happy guy. And very skinny like a skeleton, but it was very dark.
Go ahead laugh because I don’t know what to say about that.
I finally found a way to cure my loneliness as I serve my Goddess. I have found a wonderful companion. A beautiful sun dog named Pinky. Pinky has already proved to be a help in battling monsters.
That is why I told you to get a pet ages ago. You were too busy drinking beer.
Pinky is the greatest sun dog. He has already reached his third level, becoming shinier every time. I love him. My Goddess seems pleased with him too.
Sometimes more than I am with you.
I have died ten times now, I don’t know if that means anything. But there it is. I’m thirsty excuse me while Pinky and I head off to the tavern.
And now you corrupt Pinky!
I just finished my quest and was awarded my 65th brick for my Lady. Pinky has grown stronger, reaching his 4th level. So far today has been a good day.
Even I am forced to agree with my Knight. She has done well as has Pinky.
I just made Chief Master in my guild The Knights Who Say Ni. I hope my Goddess is proud.
I am I’ll be even prouder if she stays. Leaving would not be good for her health.
I finally reached level 21! Now I have the skill of spontaneous combustion. I hope my Goddess is proud!
Your Goddess is worried about her heroine. Oh but she is so much more worried about Pinky!
I Am 75% to my temple. Cough Cough. Excuse me I need a drink.
Pardon the rare display of power but Boleyn is not 75% completed. She has 75 bricks. Yes Pinky I know her ignorance knows no bounds. Luckily she has you as a companion, perhaps you could let her know subtly.
That’s better. As I was saying the temple is OUCH PINKY YOU BIT ME!
PINKY I SAID SUBTLY!
Now you lick the wound, oh right, I have 75 bricks it is still a nice number.
Boleyn is passed out so Iduna has allowed me to speak on her behalf. We now have 80 bricks but we are lucky to be alive because half-wit
PINKY
SHE KNITTED MY FUR INTO A CARDIGAN
She also saved your life.
That is true but she tried to leave the guild.
Yes I know and that is for me to deal with.
Okay but she made my fur less powerful.
I fixed it Pinky.
Thank you my lady.
You are welcome. Just continue to help her and know that I love you as I love Boleyn.
Well she has reached level 22, I have reached level 6. How did I do my lady?
Just fine thank you Pinky.
I have to hang my head in shame. Yesterday I tried to leave my guild. I thought I would get in trouble with the police if I didn’t. I forgot about all my great friends there.
You also forgot my explicit instructions.
Yes My Lady. I won’t do it again.
I won’t hold my celestial breath.
Today Pinky and I managed to finish the Temple’s bathroom. It is small but you should come here to pray. Besides everyone else around here seems to worship other Gods. I know they arew false but I don’t see them coming in and staying.
Celestial eye rolling
Oh my lady the arena is not good to me.
My Lady this is Pinky
Good morning Pinky.
I just hope you are proud of Boleyn for getting me to level ten.
I am Pinky.
MY LADY I JUST REACHED LEVEL 25! I AM SO EXCITED!
And thank you for my new motto THE RACK CARDINAL FANG NI. I have enjoyed using it and have noticed that many cower in fear when I use it!
I JUST MADE IT TO ADVISOR IN MY GUILD! NOW THEY HAVE TO LISTEN TO ME BECAUSE I’M AN ADVISOR! NI!
NO YOU SILLY CREATURE YOU HAVE TO HELP AND WHY AM I WASTING MY TIME YOU CAN’T HEAR ME AND EVEN IF YOU DID YOU WOULD IGNORE ME! FELLOW KNIGHTS I WILL LEARN FOR HER AND HELP UP AND COMING KNIGHTS!
Wow I’m pure good,no virtuous. No pure good wait virtuous, no pure good. My Lady I’m really dizzy.
I am at level 30 and I just lost my faithful companion Pinky
And you are doing what to ressurect your better half? NOTHING NOTHING FOR THE POOR CREATURE WHO GAVE HIS LIFE FOR YOU! WE ARE IN SERIOUS NEED OF GODDESS/ HEROINE COUNSELING!
My Lady I have lost my faithful companion Pinky. He was a light that was brilliant. Please take care of him for me.
Your prayer has been answered Boleyn.
My Lady I have found another pet. A Trojan Horse named Boo! I know he will be a wonderful friend!
That’s good because you need someone.
You know what I think I think it is because I needed someone..
More celestial eye rolling.
I need a drink.
My. Lady
Yes Boo.
I love Boleyn. She saved me twice. But she says some very strange things about me.
I know but take heart she says worse things aboutme.
But she worships you!
Let’s just say we have issues. Boleyn is headstrong. But I can tell you this Boo, she loves and is very proud of you!
What happened to Pinky?
That is not something you need concern yourself with. Boleyn is taking fine care of you! You should take equally good care of her and love her as much as she does you!
My lady I just leveled up to 34. And I am on an EPIC QUEST. Is this the Lord of the Rings. No I don’t have a ring but there are a lot of Golems running around!Boleyn has been lax about telling her story as of late. Naturally I must pick up the slack. I Boleyn now roams these lands alone. The question Boo ask me sometime ago has sadly been answered. When Boleyn let Boo go he did not understand but was met by a powerful being who took the panicked, lost horse to safety
As for the drama queen herself she has made hierarch. In The Knights who say Ni. She has made me proud. But there is still a selfishnes that makes me cringe. Her treatment of poor Boo is just one example she still hates to fight but sees ni as a necessary evil. Her hair is patchy. I must admit she looses far too often hopefully this will change. But where Boleyn is concerned I usually find myself shaking my head wondering how my creation could go so horribly wrong.
If I can get her hard head to listen Boleyn will be moving to Blue Feather. I hope they don’t run away screaming!
My lady I apologize for not keeping my chronicles up to date. I have a new pet a biowolf I named Cupil. Isn’t that pretty my lady?
Uh no
I have decided to leave the Knights who say Ni for Blue Feather. All on my own.
Boleyn I decided you needed a new guild. Oh who am I kidding this is you I am talking to.
I am moving to sowing Sun
Yes I know I sent you there foolish heroine!
Hey I really like it here. Very cool and Mearas got here just before me!
Oh great Mearas! Still sowing Sun is the place for you if they can stand you.
Boleyn and Cupil are three bricks away from finishing the temple therefore they are occupied at the moment.
She still maintains her hardheadedness and Cupil’s name has begun to grow on me. Otherwise this is a Goddess passing the time.
06:52: Dearest diary, today was the day! I carefully laid the last brick, swept all the rooms, opened all windows to let your glorious light shine in. I can’t believe it, your temple is finally finished, my Lady! I feel delirious with happiness.
07:42: Parrots in the main square declared: ‘WELL DONE BOLEYN I AM VERY PROUD OF YOU.’
My Lady I am late in reporting this but Cupil got his medal is that important?
YES YOU CLOT!
My Lady I heard a bartender in Godville saying you are number two in creation… what did you create.
I am sorry to say you are my creation.
An insufferable boar told me you were number one in creation what are you up to My Lady?
So a trader told me you were 2 in creation! The rumors are flying great one.
yeah yeah yeah
Now an alien space bat said you were number one again. I am very confused.
Don’t think you might break something
A trader told me you were a Gasohol. What is that?
As if I’m going to tell you and let it go to your pinhead you would try to lord over any and everyone! Not gonna happen Chica.
Look Cupil got you flowers isn’t that sweet!
I think I have encouraged her too much!
My lady can I just say that I am getting too old for Boleyn
Cupil, I am waiting for slow poke to finish her ark!
My Lady you are a Goddess do you have any gopher wood?
lightening strikes the impudent heroine
Well it never hurts to ask!
12:54 AM A log! A thousandth log! I’m even ready for a flood now. Not that I’m asking for it, my Lady. For completing an epic quest I was complimented, fed and given a pile of wooden ark planks and a golden brick as a reward.
Finally finished my ark my lady!!!!
*Yes we established that now put Cupil in it
Thank you oh divine one I don’t have to follow her around anymore!
NO you don’t some poor creature doesn’t know fate awaits it
I found a new pet I named it Dino!
I don’t like that name try Bess
09:23 AM Bird droppings spattered across the road, spelling out “WELL DONE FINISHING YOUR ARK BOLEYN! I AM VERY PROUD!.” In bird droppings almighty really?