Heroine

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Gief Epix 5

level 132

Citius, altius, berberus

Age 9 years
Personality spiteful
Guild Ankh-Morpork City Watch
(captain)
Monsters Killed about 728 thousand
Death Count 206
Wins / Losses 1301 / 272
Temple Completed at 02/02/2016
Ark Completed at 09/15/2017 (438.1%)
Pairs Gathered at 09/27/2019
Book Written at 10/28/2022
Souls Gathered 44.92%
Savings 28M, 741k (95.8%)
Pet Stag of holding Tige 15th level
Boss Spambot with 153% of power

Equipment

Weapon untuned bagpipe +142
Shield incognito mode +143
Head convertible hood +144
Body sea's cape +144
Arms shoulders of fortune +143
Legs sole protector +142
Talisman slice of moon +145

Skills

  • palm of the panda level 136
  • self-propelled feet level 135
  • street magic level 125
  • brain dilution level 125
  • radiokinesis level 123
  • golden vein level 122
  • full throttle level 119
  • lossy compression level 113
  • sunstroke level 111
  • menacing glance level 111

Feats

  • ⓶ Win an arena duel that lasts for 50+ turns
  • ⓶ Feed hungry tribbles with regular ones
  • ⓶ Fill out the newspaper bingo completely
  • ⓵ Take personality to the extreme
  • ⓵ Dig up and defeat three bosses
  • ⓵ Die to a monster and lose 15k gold

Pantheons

Gratitude10023
Might476
Templehood14112
Gladiatorship33
Storytelling147
Mastery943
Taming127
Survival1160
Savings871
Destruction450
Arkeology1253
Catch1140
Wordcraft322
Soulfulness237
Duelers2
Unity1
Popularity2
Duelery3
Adventure4

Achievements

  • Honored Animalist
  • Honored Dueler
  • Honored Favorite
  • Honored Invincible
  • Builder, 1st rank
  • Champion, 1st rank
  • Freelancer, 1st rank
  • Martyr, 1st rank
  • Saint, 1st rank
  • Savior, 1st rank
  • Scribbler, 1st rank
  • Shipwright, 1st rank
  • Fiend, 2nd rank
  • Hunter, 2nd rank
  • Miner, 2nd rank
  • Moneybag, 2nd rank
  • Soulcatcher, 2nd rank
  • Careerist, 3rd rank
  • Coach, 3rd rank
  • Raider, 3rd rank
  • Renegade, 3rd rank
  • Scientist, 3rd rank

Hero's Chronicles

“Some people are born winners. The rest are heroes.” Author unknown

My first Awakening when I became a Paragon of George the God of Aa was life-changing experience. Truly life-changing. But my second Awakening was reality-changing if you will.
This all won’t make any sense until I give you some context.

I found my God like so many others here. But we all have our own, no two are the same. Although sometimes two Gods seem to be connected somehow. Some heroes and heroines insist their Gods refer to them as Alts. Probably some word in ancient language only the Gods understand. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

I found George the God of Aa, which makes me an Aaist. The Arch Aaist actually, because I’m the only follower of George.
As all heroes and heroines I started building a temple of golden bricks. I know, right?

Lost all my friends, but started to get on with other heroes and heroines, who were all giving up their former life for once in servitude to their God or Godess.

Miraculously it only took me about a year and weirdly enough, it was only a thousand bricks. And exactly a thousand bricks. All the temples here in Godville are made with one thousand golden bricks. Remember that number, it’s significant. But I’ll get back to that when I tell you about the second Awakening.

Anyway I’ve made the temple of George and I have visions of making an ark, putting all kinds of manimals and feminals in there. So here’s another insane megalomaniac friend-losing scheme cutting me of further and further from normal society into this weird parallel dimension of heroes and heroines wielding immense power from equipment that sounds more like a bad joke than some fearsome weapon or impenetrable armor. On top of that some of the skills we use in battle or in bargaining are defying reality in their approach but, after years of using them, also extremely effective. I mean I used Mosquito Roar in the past. It’s ridiculous, but after ripping a Spam bot to shreds with it one day, there’s no doubt about it being effective.

Before long you just hang with heroes and heroines, you join a guild, you tame a pet, you kill monsters, you fish, but most of all you drink.
I think we’re all drinking to forget what life we had before we found our God. Even the guilds we’re in seem to be run by the Gods. There’s so much strife between the guilds, it’s like we’re all in a competition of sorts, but no one knows what’s even at stake. But part of that competition is centred on our Gods performing miracles in towns. Godville, of course, is the worst for this.
I’m sorry I keep getting side tracked, but you’ll see it all makes sense when I get to my second Awakening.

So I’ve built an ark out of logs of gopher wood, it took a bit longer than the temple, but funny enough, it took exactly one thousand logs. And again it’s the same with all the arks others have built. I mean I haven’t really stopped expanding it, but originally when I finished it, it was one thousands logs. I’ve decided to put some of my older pets in there, although sometimes I wonder why I keep them there, might as well let them go. But something keeps me from that.
And after building the ark, everyone starts collecting pairs of animals, which sounds a bit weird, but it gets weirder… When the ark has the right number of pairs (you’ve guessed it: 1000) the logical next step for everyone is a laboratory. There we put together monsters from monster parts and we bring it to life with more pairs of creatures. I was shocked!

Anyway I’ve created my third lab boss now, it’s great fun pottering around with the parts.
And again everyone starts with the next thing, a Holy Book. You’ve guessed it already, you need to obtain 1000 Holy Words, consisting of four glyphs each. Thank goodness you can can collect them easiest through dreaming. I wonder what will come after that.

This leads to the epiphany I’ve had recently. The Gods are playing with us! Some Gods seem to have abandoned their heroes over time, or the heroes abandoned their Gods. But the amount of shouting from the skies, the lightning, angels, unicorns and a whole plethora of other heralds is insane. I don’t like going to Godville anymore, the amount of temples there, both finished and being built, is staggering. My count is nearly 50,000.
And then there’s the miracles… don’t get me started on the miracles. Our Gods are apparently under the impression that we all drink because it’s all we do. Well, drinking and killing it seems. But most of us just want to forget and purge.
But there is an escape it seems, or at least a lightening of the burden. If your God gets bored, he will leave you to your own devices. Then you only have to stay away from towns, oh and monsters.

00:28 Pondered taking the path of atheism for a moment, but then realized that I’d have no one to complain to. I think I’ll stick with you, Mighty One.