My name is Dante Hicks. I started out my life as a good boy, followed the rules, mowed my lawn. Being a good guy is boring… it does not get you any closer to these ladies here in Godville, than a place called ‘friend zone’. So, I’m now the bad boy every girl says she doesn’t want, yet always goes for.
I’ve been around these parts since September, slaying monsters and building a pretty amazing temple to my goddess. Some say she doesn’t exist, but I’ve got scars to prove that she does!
I’ve got a rather amazing pet, a four legged fiend. He’s got the moniker of Scratchy the Dandy Lion, (the role of Scratchy is now being fulfilled by Oy the Bipolar Bear) at least that’s what his business cards say. He’s a perilous clumsy gent, smart and… He. Breathes. Fire. Fire!!!
So, ladies, if you’re looking for an evil guy, who might just treat you mediocre… Look me up. I’m in Bumchester quite a bit (which, apparently really makes my lady cross). In any pub with alcohol… or even the nearest Guild Name headquarters. I’ll be the one bleeding.
Epic tales from the day I was lost… I was battling monsters, when suddenly I felt free and yet… lost. My Goddess did not answer my smart remark with a lightening bolt to my head, or throw large heavy objects at me! Why did she decide to forsake me? April 26 afternoon to April 27 afternoon… The day I was on my own.
Oy and I decided to spend money as we pleased, with no Goddess punishing me, I could buy that questionable lass a few dozen drinks. Oy got the best monster meat! But, guilt kicked in. Guilt! I had a feeling my Goddess was just on a short leave, and could be back at any time.
I met with several heroes who were on their own too. The good ones thought they did something wrong, we evil heroes knew we did… and wondered if maybe we weren’t doing ENOUGH bad.
It was a long day. I’m glad to see that my Goddess is back to strike me down! With love of course.
The mystery of my Goddess!
I worship Her, and yet I have no clue about her. Today is a day that makes my Goddess happy every other week. Saturday seems to be a normal day to me, what with the normal routine, but She seems happier today. So, whilst I battle monsters and chase the ladies, She gets to lounge about. I doubt Her dedication sometimes! Ouch, my Lady! I didn’t mean it! Maybe She is paying more attention to me today… guess I shouldn’t question her dedication to me.
Bumchester, My Goddess must hate it!
Was feeling a bit almost dead, so I decided to rest up in town. Bumchester was very close by. As soon as I was feeling rested and was done at the Guild doctor… lightning bolt! Just as I started to heal again, you guessed it, MORE LIGHTNING BOLTS! I get zapped by My Lady, but every time I am in Bumchester, it’s exponentially worse! She really must hate that town. I keep forgetting how much she hates it, until I’m charbroiled!
Temple complete! 13:37: Dearest diary, today was the day! I carefully laid the last brick, swept all the rooms, opened all windows to let your glorious light shine in. I can’t believe it, your temple is finally finished, my Lady! I feel delirious with happiness.
Having Guild Name Temple 19, feels fantastic. It was hard work, dedication, and getting zapped that got me here. Goddess, I hope you are as happy as I am!
Lost another pet, so bummed- 11:48 PM Took Rex to a local orphanage to try to cheer up the children. It worked so well that the kids begged him to stay. He gave me a wistful glance and a sad smile before going inside. Farewell, Rex, I hope you give those kids as many fond memories as you have given me.