14:01: Mighty One, I wanted to build you a temple of golden bricks, but the merchant said gold is better spent. So I bought this cool helmet of thickheadedness instead
18:14: Wow, I am level 35 now! Luckily intelligence isn’t a requirement for level-ups08:41: I’m worried that my significant otter is hanging with a bad crowd. What should I do, Great One?
08:48: Followed a stray dog for an hour thinking it was my significant otter. Got an evil glare from Tige when I found him again
19:56: Almighty, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the gold to buy shiny new things. Meanwhile, please accept my humble donation of 69 coins.
19:56: A wandering sage told me that some are wise, but I am otherwise07:50: My quest to reap and sow some wild oats was a triumph! I’m making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS. Got a golden brick too
18:30: My Lady, remind me never to get a you-know-what for you-know-who again. I didn’t get anything for it, not even a ‘Thank you’
20:57: My Luv Child stopped by and gave me a hug. Life is beautiful
21:31: Bootstrap Jenkins asked me if I could finish his quest to become the 88th member of the guild “The Guild of Calamitous Intent” for him. I’d do anything to help a frie… Hey! He hasn’t even started!
21:07: Found a pile of new artifacts still warm from materialization: a stepping stone, some incriminating evidence, and a bag of computer chips. Splendid, I’ll swap them for a drink tonight.
21:39: Met Supreme Nacho, and together we rested by a campfire. The warm meal and the good company helped restore quite a bit of my health15:16: Fell into another hero’s trap. I would have been injured, but Hmccracca was lying at the bottom and broke my fall
18:01: Yelled “Fair Exchange No Robbery!” into the night. Paid 1165 coins as a compensation for waking half the city. 00:18: Entered a bamboo grove to get some rest, but met Bossmandingo there. We built a little field altar and prayed to our gods. Maybe we should build a pantheon next timeInventory
diary of an abandoned hero majority report object of affection key to the executive washroom stereotypewriter brick of purest green loose cannon can of midnight oil troll bait quantum heap invisible ink
11:16 AM Supreme Nacho challenged me to an archery contest. We had to leave when my first arrow got stuck in the Mayor’s hat.
01:49 PM Trained Tige to strike a fierce and intimidating pose when I yell “Fair Exchange No Robbery!”. Now we’ll really look like a team 07:22 PM Found 1119 gold coins in a pot near the construction site. Wow, my temple already has some followers !01:04 AM Opened the box with a question mark to see what was inside. Found a note saying that after my case was reviewed, my experience points were deemed lawful and that I will receive 2971 experience points as compensation
11:29 AM Back to life. Back to reality
08:07 AM Suddenly felt an irresistible urge to take apart the dimensional destabilizer and found 3194 coins inside. Now that’s the intuition of a true hero
07:18 PM I couldn’t miss this great deal and changed my boring “drunken rampage” skill to the new exciting “effect of the groundhog” skill of the same level. Oh, boy, I love this customer service
04:30 PM I was admiring a painting when the subject came to life and told me to plant something good and eternal! What kind of force is at work?09:14 PM I found my name in a heart with an arrow tough it carved into a tree. I think someone is planning to kill me
08:56 PM So I met a Thugs Bunny and yada, yada, yada… now I’ve got 10 gold coins and an unholy grail
08:56 PM Am I bothering you, Omnipotent One? Am I? Am I? Huh? Am I? Well? Because I sure am bothering myself
10:38 AM Was finally resurrected by pagan priests after waiting for a long time04:31 PM An idea struck me, but it disappeared before I had a chance to hit it back.
02:38 PM I’m too restless to recuperate and too lazy to do anything useful. Luckily, I’m also too thirsty to stay sober. Off to the tavern !Dipping the hard-earned nuggets of wisdom in the ranch sauce of ignorance..
03:28 PM Ran into Hmccracca on the road. We tried to reminisce about the “good ol’ days,” but our diaries only go back a few minutes05:32 AM I couldn’t miss this great deal and changed my boring “mosquito roar” skill to the new exciting “steel finger” skill of the same level. Oh, boy, I love this customer service
09:32 PM Fell down a hill. Hit the ground repeatedly as I flipped over and over again all the way to the bottom. That’s how I roll 09:07 AM Turned over a new leaf. Got bitten by ants11:20 AM My Goddess, if what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger, then do I get weaker every time you resurrect me
11:56 AM Caught Tige mocking me behind my back today by pretending to write in a diary and making a stupid face. Oh, my Lady, must I be ridiculed by my own significant otter too?
02:12 PM I don’t mind the afterlife, some people here owe me money.
05:41 AM They say the best part of waking up is fresh beer in your cup. Next time see that you comply, Most Righteous
OneEmotionally exhausted and morally bankrupt.. Bring sexy back once and for all