level 92

For the love of pie!

Age 7 years 11 months
Personality neutral
Guild no guild
Monsters Killed about 273 thousand
Death Count 96
Wins / Losses 29 / 95
Temple Completed at 11/02/2014
Ark Completed at 02/09/2019 (179.6%)
Twos of Every Kind 605m, 603f (60.3%)
Savings 9M, 182k (30.6%)
Pet Vengeful mole Avogadro 30th level


Weapon point-and-shoot sword +101
Shield filibuster +102
Head eye tunes +101
Body armor geddon +101
Arms rolled-up sleeves +103
Legs blade running shoes +101
Talisman lucky star +101


  • thumb beating level 75
  • bad breath level 71
  • eye scream level 70
  • brain dilution level 68
  • disarming smile level 67
  • navel clamp level 65
  • mating contact level 64
  • glance of Kaa level 60
  • full throttle level 60
  • mountain moving level 43




  • Honored Renegade
  • Animalist, 1st rank
  • Builder, 1st rank
  • Careerist, 1st rank
  • Favorite, 1st rank
  • Shipwright, 1st rank
  • Hunter, 2nd rank
  • Martyr, 2nd rank
  • Raider, 2nd rank
  • Saint, 2nd rank
  • Savior, 2nd rank
  • Champion, 3rd rank
  • Fiend, 3rd rank
  • Moneybag, 3rd rank

Hero's Chronicles

(Story badly needs updates. Hope to continue once I have inspiration.

I tend to drive if I got random matched into the dungeon.

I send my hero to duel and refuse to help as punishment for dying. Don’t waste your charges if that’s the case.)

Kela: “05:41 PM I offer 1 gold coin to thee, my Lady!”

Mira: “I should have known I could expect this…”


Nara: "In the centuries and centuries past, the benevolent Lady, Miracelle, the gracious {Mira: yeah, right} goddess of Light, has watched over humanity from her seat far above the earthly realm. Unto all whom she looked kindly upon {Mira: No one…?}, she bestowed blessings of sunshine and warmth, happiness and peace, health and fortune {Kele: And pie!}.

“However, as the centuries went on, gods and goddesses of greater power and aggressiveness rose. Miracelle’s power was not as strong as the others, and proper worship gradually dwindled away. Fields of wheat which once flourished with her magnificent Light now flourished due to the light of other deities withered. Her great name became unknown among the common people, and even the temples that were dedicated to her glory became abandoned and left at the mercy of golden-brick raiders.

“Miracelle was greatly saddened at this, as she could do nought but watch as the lands below fell to the influence of other gods ruin. How she wished to restore her power. And how she hoped for one through whom she could work her will.

“But one day, a brave, dashing {Kele: really?} {Mira: No.} man appeared. He was noble yet kind, and gifted with the power of Miracelle’s Light. Some, who had held fast to their old religion, even said that he was the very incarnation of the Lady {Mira: WAIT WAHT?!}. Could he be the one who could bring back the once famous power of Miracelle?”

Kela: Most High, why is my name so feminine?

Mira: Shut up and keep smiting.

Lesser Story

Nara: "These are the details of how the hero Keleicea rose to great ness.

Humble beginnings

“Orphaned at a young age, Keleicea was taken in by the faithful priests of the (unfortunately still wooden bricked) holy temple of Miracelle, goddess of Light, located in the great city of Godville, in the street where all the other temples were. He was taught Light magic and trained the many arts of temple cleaning, in the hopes that someday he may take the place of the priests which he lived under.

“Needless to say, Keleicea thoroughly failed in all his trainings. He preferred to play-fighting with other children on the streets rather than studying the pronunciation of symbols of power, and admired famous heroes who slew terrible beasts, rather than the priests who were quick to pluck out and heal the less famous heroes who failed to slew the terrible beast. Even in his teenage years, his head was full of idle fantasies, in which he was a mighty warrior, capable of defeating monsters and protecting fragile princesses. Occasionally, he would daydream about who his mother and father might be.

“The temple priests, of course, grew tired of Keleicea freeloading. When he was legally old enough to live independently, they kicked him out under the pretense of allowing him to do what he had always wanted to do. Thus, Keleicea set in his heart to become the greatest of heroes and immediately signed up for the first quest he laid eyes on, grabbed whatever rubbish <-10> weapon he could find, and set out toward unknown lands…”

Divine voice

“Some time during Keleicea’s journeying, he started hearing a voice. No, not the numerous voices he constantly heard in his head, but a voice that seem to always be directly behind him despite there being nobody there. Having a rather limited brain, he couldn’t figure out the identity of the voice until it told him. ‘I am Miracelle, your great goddess, worshiped by your predecessors. It is I who have watched over you all your life. I charge you to build me a temple of gold for my honour and glory.’ Keleicea felt excited at this notion and readily agreed, not knowing what hardships would lie ahead.”

First love

“Inevitably, Keleicea began to feel rather lonely and homesick. After all, he would wander day and night through areas far from anywhere he knew, surrounded by nothing but the hostility of monsters, tumbleweed and occasional trolls. There was a gaping hole in his heart, which he continuously failed to fill with beer. Then, on one return to his beloved temple, he had a brilliant idea, inspired by his inbuilt coding. ‘Why not get a pet?’ The priests had a pet, a giant golden slug, said to be the sacred symbol of Miracelle. Unfortunately, at that time, giant slugs could only be found sold as delicacies, not pets. Keleicea could only return to the wilderness, alone.

“That was, until one day, while he was resting, battered and bruised, a Santa Claws quietly came up to him and began licking his wounds. Surprised that it didn’t straight out pass out drunk, Keleicea decided to adopt this little bugger. ‘Alright, a pet! I’ll call you Pinkie Pie!’ he said, even though he couldn’t have ever watched TV in his life. Well, not quite, since ‘Pinkie’ wasn’t recognised by his dictionary and his goddess refused to let that name have anything to do with pies, he settled for the name Pinky.”

First loss

“Pinky fought alongside Keleicea as they journeyed together, occasionally having to drag carry his lazy owner from one milestone to the next. However, on one fateful afternoon, Keleicea had to experience the loss of his first free ride pet.

02:35 AM The Prince of Whales raised its hand for a deadly final strike against me, when Pinky suddenly threw himself under its feet. The monster stumbled and fell dead on the ground, its neck broken. Pinky was knocked out by the impact of the monster’s carcass. Oh, my Lady, if I don’t bring him back to his senses in time, he’ll lose all his levels and his will to compete!

“Shocked beyond his senses and silently considering the consequences if monsters were able to level up and become stronger, Keleicea stood, paralyzed, for a long time. At last, he came to the conclusion that monsters would most likely move far underground where it was safer to keep their treasures, and sorrowfully carried Pinky back to the nearest town. He used every means possible to scrape together enough gold to revive him. Unfortunately, he walked right past the priests on his way out of town out of habit. The bastard.”

Kele: Some heroes say they’re too cool for school, but I’m not cool enough for school. Also, what’s school?

(story to be continued…)

07:16 PM I just saw my Chronicles in a book shop… When I asked, the shop owner said he had to pay people to buy it.

Thanks everyone who voted!