FUNNY COMMENTS & NOTEWORTHY EVENTS
07:32: The Bicyclops tried to convince me that slaying it would fracture the space-time continuum… I knew it was bluffing. Got 31 coins.
07:38: Tied a string around my finger to remind myself that I have a string tied around my finger.
07:42: As I walked half-starving into a small hamlet, the villagers offered me some behemoth-flavored tea to ward off the monster they’d heard growling in the woods. I didn’t have the heart to tell them that was just my stomach.
06:17: It’s raining cats and dogs. There are poodles all over the road.
07:08: Hmm, starting to regret that last diary entry. Maybe if I run really fast counterclockwise I can turn back time and erase it?
09:33: Thought about writing a diary entry, but decided against it.
Enemy: Google-eyed Android, the Google-eyed Android unnerves the heroine by humming the theme of Jaws…
Quest: Saw a leg off the periodic table
09:11: Omnipotent One, I think all these head injuries I’m getting from fighting are making me lose my short term memory. I also think that all these head injuries I’m getting from fighting are making me lose my short term memory.
06:52: Had a perfectly normal sandwich for lunch. It tasted perfectly normal. I wonder what was wrong with it.
07:45: Lost all my writing utensils. Guess my diary will have to wait until I buy a new quill.
Inventory Item: “Don’t be a noob” guide.
10:10: Found a yellow submarine at the seashore yesterday, but it was infested with beetles so I let it be.
06:45: Felt butterflies in my stomach. I guess eating those caterpillars the other day was a bad idea. 05:30: “The Diary of Luciania” sounds lame. Maybe I should call it “The Epic Chronicles of Luciania”? 07:02: For a huge pile of gold coins I bought just one single golden brick. But it was worth every coin! I must say that this is the most perfect form for each and every lump of gold.
09:13: I can’t believe I’m level 20 already. People tell me that I look much younger though, and I still act like a total noob.
11:56: I am completing my daily exercise of one sit-up. I started it this morning when I woke up, and am finishing it this evening as I lie down.
07:38: “Stubby the rocky raccoon” sounds distinguished, doesn’t it? My Lady, do you like my pet?
01:52: Hooray! After all this long and agonizing traveling, the quest to change the world, then change it back is finally over. Got a golden brick, bottom armor and 12058 gold coins as a reward!
01:06: I heard that fortune favors the bold, but I can’t figure out how to change the font of this pen.
02:11: Once you manage to pass the test of time – an epic reward is already in your pocket! I already feel 12203 coins richer and much closer to my next level!
07:30: Fell asleep and woke up a few minutes in the future. Freaky!
01:47: It turned out that to collect two animals of every kind can be very profitable. I’ve got three golden bricks and power gloves for doing it!
Inventory item: World’s tiniest violin.
09:16: Found a “Mobile Medic” kiosk by the roadside. As per instructions, I dropped a blue pill of happiness into the slot, and now my health is restored! This thing is better than a guild doctor!
03:53: Went with my pet to advanced pet fights. Stubby valiantly defeated and marked the opponent, earning us solid 2117 coins of cookie money. Good job, Stubby!
04:11: Jumped through a portal… and reappeared right behind it. Didn’t travel very far, but I lived to tell the tale.
06:05: Put my “tooth sampling” skill into practice and got a 21% discount.
The Sewer Gator is shouting “EX-TER-MIN-ATE!” in a shrill metallic voice…
10/12/12, 09:38: Judging by Stubby’s face I think he’s tired of me. I guess it’s time to finally set him free. Farewell, Stubby! I promise to find a new best friend in your memory!
10/12/12, 12:09: I looked into the kind eyes of the vanquished monster and suddenly decided — Dandy Lion, you’ll be my pet! And I’ll call you Bolt. Bandaged his wounds, gave him a treat and fastened the leash.
05:57: Bolt suddenly grabbed me, and milestones started to flash before my eyes… Uh, at least we’re rushing in the right direction.
07:58: I heard that if you love someone, you should set them free. I released Bolt into the wild to pursue his hopes and dreams. Meanwhile, I’m off to pursue all my greatest ambitions, in the tavern.
12:07: I looked into the kind eyes of the vanquished monster and suddenly decided — Bipolar Bear, you’ll be my pet! And I’ll call you Timon. Bandaged his wounds, gave him a treat and fastened the leash.
11:47: Went with my Timon on pet fights for beginners. He valiantly defeated and marked the opponent, earning us 507 gold coins of cookie money. Good job, Timon!
Quest: Put a black hole into the middle of a donut
Enemy: Over-confident Noob
08:31: The Imposterior raised its hand for a deadly final strike, but Timon suddenly flung himself at the monster’s feet. The monster stumbled and fell dead on the ground, breaking its neck. Good job, Timon! You’ve saved my life and thanks to your medal you didn’t even hurt yourself!
07:41: Judging by Timon’s face I think he’s tired of me. I guess it’s time to finally set him free. Farewell, Timon! I promise to find a new best friend in your memory!
04:10: I was just about to defeat the Heffalump when he pulled out a beer and offered it to me. Hey, I could use a good drinking buddy. Slapped a collar on him and named him Dumbo. He looks like he’s regretting his choice now.
05:26: Notes from the battlefield: The Wherewolf was too tough for me, so I bribed it with 0 coins and ran away. What a pity that I won’t be able to complete this mini-quest.
06:13: Judging by Dumbo’s face I think he’s tired of me. I guess it’s time to finally set him free. Farewell, Dumbo! I promise to find a new best friend in your memory!
09:14: I was just about to defeat the Grounded Hog when he pulled out a beer and offered it to me. Hey, I could use a good drinking buddy. Slapped a collar on him and named him Tige. He looks like he’s regretting his choice now.
02:43: The Enemy of the People suddenly froze mid-strike. Not sure what to do, I spell checked my diary, played fetch with Tige, and counted my coins. Upon reanimating, he thanked me for being a hero of honor by not killing him as he stood there helpless. Darn! Why didn’t I think of that earlier?
12:53: A sudden downpour forced me to take shelter in a nearby cave. While I was looking around, I noticed something on the wall. Upon closer inspection I saw a message that promised a great reward for anyone who would find the perimeter of the Koch Snowflake. Looks like a job for Luciania!
02:44: Hope that I won’t have to find the perimeter of the Koch Snowflake again. But the reward was good: an extra dose of experience and a shiny golden brick!
Quest #1069: Find the perimeter of the Koch Snowflake
Quest #1000: Find the exception to every rule (epic)
Quest: Unify quantum mechanics with relativity
07:16: The gift of fate suddenly jumped out of my backpack, fell to the ground, started to sizzle, and slowly transformed into gift of fate. I love these SFX!
08:12: I heard that if you love someone, you should set them free. I released Tige into the wild to pursue his hopes and dreams. Meanwhile, I’m off to pursue all my greatest ambitions, in the tavern.
07:39: After such a glorious battle with the Hyper Lynx I could not bring myself to deliver the finishing blow. Instead, he will be my new companion. Come along, Sandy, let’s go questing!
10:52 I couldn’t miss this great deal and changed my boring “glance of Kaa” skill to the new exciting “glance of Kaa” skill of the same level. Oh, boy, I love this customer service!
Administering acupuncture to herself by rolling around on a hedgehog…
08:32 The gladiators’ yearbook just came out. The editorial staff captioned my picture, “Voted least likely to successfully find the perimeter of the Koch Snowflake.” Time to prove them wrong! ; Quest #1422: Find the perimeter of the Koch Snowflake ; 06:44 Finally end up finding the perimeter of the koch snowflake by moving ahead one milepost, rotating counterclockwise, and drinking three beers.
09:57 I found a box labeled ‘cake’, but it was empty. Heartbroken. The cake was a lie…
01/10/15 12:47 AM I looked into the kind eyes of the vanquished monster and suddenly decided — Philosoraptor, you’ll be my pet! And I’ll call you Dogmeat. Bandaged his wounds, gave him a treat and fastened the leash.
10:46 Divine enlightenment politely made it clear that I was calling my pet by the wrong name all this time. I’ll be calling him Albert from now on!
05:19 As the Holy Mass Murderer was about to deliver me unto death, I asked him in a ragged voice, “Why?” He looked at me with greatest contempt and asked, “Remember that chain letter you didn’t forward?” Darn it!
09:05 It’s unclear where the bait went… On a positive note, I now have one more fenimal living in my ark.
09:24 Found a crashed whale in an open field. Got lost in thought.
09:14 I suppose that being a member of the ‘Isotop’ guild could be quite profitable. It’s time to join those fellows.
07:37 Oh, this Higgs Bison is the totem of our guild! Offered it various honors and got an aura-scope and a wish of further career growth in return.
09:16 Let me get this straight. If I do this NAND die, then I get rewarded with gold EXOR experience?
Hope that I won’t have to walk through a Boolean gate again. But the reward was good: an extra dose of experience and a shiny golden brick!
09:02 After a long night celebrating the completion of my last quest, I woke up in a strange barn with a note pinned to my shirt commanding me to take the day off. I’ll start on that right after a quick nap.
04:22 I looked into the kind eyes of the vanquished monster and suddenly decided — Terror Bull, you’ll be my pet! And I’ll call you Cuddles. Bandaged his wounds, gave him a treat and fastened the leash.
10:13 I was just about to defeat the Gummy Wyrm when he pulled out a beer and offered it to me. Hey, I could use a good drinking buddy. Slapped a collar on him and named him Bolt. He looks like he’s regretting his choice now.
While fishing: “If I could wish for just one dish, my greatest wish would be more fish…”
Final Golden Brick: 08:49: When I was counting my money, a coin caught the sun, and I was blinded for a moment. My vision cleared and I found a gold brick in my hands where my coins had been.
Completing Temple: 09:53: The earth suddenly shook, the sky rained byte-code… A sleeping Godville Administrator rolled over in a far-off cave.
Completing Ark: 01:24 A log! A thousandth log! I’m even ready for a flood now. Not that I’m asking for it, Soul Supreme.
Furtherest distance reached: 1140th milestone
Smile, love & live life
|Monsters Killed||about 351 thousand|
|Wins / Losses||42 / 36|
|Temple Completed at||09/21/2013|
|Ark Completed at||06/24/2015 (266.6%)|
|Twos of Every Kind||765m, 747f (74.7%)||Savings||10M, 167k (33.9%)|
|Pet||Octobear Rex 7th level|
|Legs||blade running shoes||+101|
|Talisman||amulet of industrial strength||+100|
- strong brow level 100
- forced generosity level 99
- seasickness level 91
- thumb beating level 85
- mountain moving level 73
- tooth sampling level 60
- drunken rampage level 58
- knight's move level 53
- full throttle level 49
- electro-broom level 47
- Honored Favorite
- Animalist, 1st rank
- Builder, 1st rank
- Martyr, 1st rank
- Shipwright, 1st rank
- Careerist, 2nd rank
- Hunter, 2nd rank
- Moneybag, 2nd rank
- Renegade, 2nd rank
- Saint, 2nd rank
- Savior, 2nd rank
- Champion, 3rd rank