June 8, 2023 – 11:40 a.m. Wrote down the thousandth word into the holy book, took a deep breath and snapped my numb fingers. Hallelujah, Omnipotent One, the great work is done!
September 13, 2020 – 08:47 p.m. I leveled up! A huge golden podium rose out of the ground, giving me a chance to do an epic hero pose. Finally a level up as extravagant as Oy’s!
This was the first skill I ever learned. I have had it for over 4 years. Many others have come and gone but this one always remained… until today, when apparently I was bored enough to ‘swap it’ for some other random skill.
June 8, 2020 – 09:30 p.m. I couldn’t miss this great deal and changed my boring “asynchronous swimming” skill to the new exciting “elbow bite” skill of the same level. Oh, boy, I love this customer service!
June 2, 2020 – 02:33 a.m. An epic but short burst of music played mysteriously, and the words “Level Up!” appeared above my head in glorious 3D. Seems I’m level 100 now!
May 18, 2020 – 02:20 p.m. It’s alive… It’s alive, it’s moving, it’s alive, it’s alive, it’s alive, it’s alive, IT’S ALIVE!
-My first Boss-monster has been created
07:59 p.m. This holy crap is a well-crafted limited edition and perfectly suited for stylish yet brutal combat, but I bought it because it was shiny. It’s certainly worth 8192 coins!
12:54 a.m. The repetitious, superfluous overabundance of redundancy has been defeated, crushed, extirpated, and smashed! I’m hoping it was worthwhile, that I earned a reward, got a prize and will be fully remunerated for my efforts, exertions, and hard work.
A hero’s work is never done, but my quest to stamp out, eliminate and abolish redundancy certainly is. This golden brick is a nice reward for such a thankless job.
December 27, 2019 – 04:16 p.m. Gentle One, I just re-counted the pairs and I think the ark now has a thousand of them. We’re not going to cram another thousand in there, are we?
09:13 p.m. Pain wracks my body. I scream as golden light pours from every inch of my skin. I don’t think my clothes fit any more. Wait, was that a miracle, or did I regenerate? What do you think, Pinky, my faithful companion?
02:31 a.m. I don’t know if I’m more surprised to be alive at level 89, or that I can count that high.
09:44 AM I’ve grown slightly bigger as I hit level 86. More of me to love, Omnipotent One!
04:36 PM An epic but short burst of music played mysteriously, and the words “Level Up!” appeared above my head in glorious 3D. Seems I’m level 85 now!
04:14 PM I don’t know if I’m more surprised to be alive at level 81, or that I can count that high.
06:06 PM I found it, but it doesn’t seem to do anything. Did I break it? Hopefully no one finds out about this. Maybe I should hide it again.
Finally! My quest to find the light switch for the dark side of the moon is done. After hearing about how epic I was, I humbly accepted six logs for the ark and a gift-wrapped, triple-sized chunk of experience.
06:17 PM Rolled three double-ones in succession and the universe gave up.
Finally! My quest to play dice with the universe is done. After hearing about how epic I was, I humbly accepted six logs for the ark and a gift-wrapped, triple-sized chunk of experience.
09:21 AM After such a glorious battle with the Heffalump I could not bring myself to deliver the finishing blow. Instead, he will be my new companion. Come along, Pinky, let’s go questing!
December 19, 2017 – 06:32 AM
A log! A thousandth log! I’m even ready for a flood now. Not that I’m asking for it, Most Righteous One.
After managing to count how many steps it takes to wear out a pair of shoes so quickly, I’ve got a pile of wooden ark planks and 6184 gold coins as a bonus.
09:22 PM I’m made out of stuff that used to be inside long dead stars. How much more “one with the universe” can I get?
After managing to become one with the universe so quickly, I’ve got a pile of wooden ark planks and 7925 coins as a bonus.
07:03 PM I leveled up! A huge golden podium rose out of the ground, giving me a chance to do an epic hero pose. Finally a level up as extravagant as Felix’s!
(Level 71)
05:13 AM Did everything once. Now heading to the tavern to try some beer for a second time.
After managing to try everything once, and maybe even twice so quickly, I’ve got six logs for the ark and 7649 gold coins as a bonus.
12:46 PM Used a convenient pole to
save a young hero from being washed away by a river. He stuck the pole in the ground nearby and declared it to be the east pole.
After managing to find the East Pole and claim it in the name of Godville so quickly, I’ve got six logs for the ark and 6837 gold coins as a bonus.
July 01, 2017 – 12:01 PM
‘no guild’
Congratulations to the new guild leader – Jim22!
09:09 AM Finally! My quest to get certified as a professional quest-taker is done. After hearing about how epic I was, I humbly accepted a pile of wooden ark planks and a gift-wrapped, triple-sized chunk of experience.
04:54 PM It took me this long to reali—?! I’m
too embarrassed to speak of this ever again.
After managing to realize there is no quest so quickly, I’ve got a pile of wooden ark planks and 7712 gold coins as a bonus.
04:41 AM I leveled up! A huge golden podium rose out of the ground, giving me a chance to do an epic hero pose. Finally a level up as extravagant as Felix’s!
10:08 AM Not able to end my quest, I decided to take my life. And suddenly when I almost passed away my quest was completed! Strange. Very strange.
Finally! My quest to rid Godville of all the unnecessary drama is done. After hearing about how epic I was, I humbly accepted six logs for the ark and a gift-wrapped, triple-sized chunk of experience.
11:18 AM It took exactly one step into a pool of acid, to wear out the shoes and obtain bad burns on my legs and feet… they sure don’t make them like they used to!
For completing an epic quest I was complimented, fed and given six logs for the ark and a golden brick as a reward.
05:58 AM Finally found a shooting star! It looks like its target is… Oh. I’d better run!
Finally! My quest to find the target of a shooting star is done. After hearing about how epic I was, I humbly accepted a pile of wooden ark planks and a gift-wrapped, triple-sized chunk of experience.
06:06 AM By the power of Godville, I have the power! Level 53 is mine, Most Righteous One.
12:39 AM That’s funny, I appear to be where I started.
Finally! My quest to travel east until it turns into the west is done. After hearing about how epic I was, I humbly accepted six logs for the ark and a gift-wrapped, triple-sized chunk of experience.
09:54 AM I found all the buckets I wanted right here, in this field and not in that burning town over there.
Finally! My quest to collect all the buckets on your bucket list is done. After hearing about how epic I was, I humbly accepted four logs of gopher wood and a gift-wrapped, triple-sized chunk of experience.
May 14, 2016 – 04:49 PM
Carefully placed the last brick, swept all the rooms, opened all doors, and cut the ribbon in a stately manner with my sword. I can’t believe it’s finally happened! After all these months of work, the temple in your name is finished, my Lord! I feel crazy with happiness.
03:35 AM Used a convenient pole to save a young hero from being washed away by a river. He stuck the pole in the ground nearby and declared it to be the east pole.
Hooray! After all this long and agonizing traveling, the quest to find the East Pole and claim it in the name of Godville is finally over. Got a golden brick, a sonic boomerang and 10379 coins as a reward!
10:32 PM Wow, I am level 43 now! Luckily intelligence isn’t a requirement for level-ups.
01:42 PM It was easy to reverse the world’s rotation. All I had to do was stand on my head and walk on my hands backwards. Of course everybody else looked like they were moving in reverse, but I know better!
It turned out that to reverse the world’s rotation can be very profitable. I’ve got three golden bricks and a Faraday cage for doing it!
01:08 PM After all my hard work, I discovered I’d been doing the wrong quest this whole time.
It turned out that to achieve an epic fail can be very profitable. I’ve got three golden bricks and a holy halo for doing it!
03:22 AM I can’t believe I’m level 37 already. People tell me that I look much younger though, and I still act like a total noob.
Nov. 23rd, 2022 – 03:36 p.m. In the name of Godville, I have the power! Level 118 is mine, Soul Supreme.