Hero

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I Am Expendeble

level 95

Its time for Bobobo world

Age 12 years 7 months
Personality neutral
Guild no guild
Monsters Killed about 365 thousand
Death Count 207
Wins / Losses 30 / 37
Temple Completed at 07/15/2014
Ark Completed at 08/25/2016 (239.7%)
Twos of Every Kind 704m, 775f (70.4%)
Savings 10M, 245k (34.2%)
Pet Gummy wyrm Sven

Equipment

Weapon North Poleaxe +103
Shield health insurance card +102
Head eye tunes +103
Body scuba diving suit +105
Arms puffy pirate sleeves +103
Legs kilt of a thousand drafts +101
Talisman holy crap +102

Skills

  • foot massage level 100
  • asynchronous swimming level 99
  • rays of love level 93
  • radioportation level 91
  • tin throat level 73
  • win on points level 73
  • battle chess level 72
  • lion belch level 70
  • exhaust of the dragon level 67
  • toe-bite level 57

Pantheons

Gratitude4607
Might7259
Templehood10083

Achievements

  • Honored Renegade
  • Animalist, 1st rank
  • Builder, 1st rank
  • Careerist, 1st rank
  • Martyr, 1st rank
  • Shipwright, 1st rank
  • Favorite, 2nd rank
  • Hunter, 2nd rank
  • Moneybag, 2nd rank
  • Saint, 2nd rank
  • Savior, 2nd rank
  • Champion, 3rd rank
  • Freelancer, 3rd rank

Hero's Chronicles

Quest #13 Start the “I AM” guild in Godville (completed) (100%)

12:50: A silly, old, yellow bear gave me a hug, restoring several pixels of my health. x2

19:38: Hmm… nice settlement you have here. San Satanos, you say?

17:40: Took the midnight train going anywhere.

16:04: The vile Godvillain made an insulting remark about my god. It must pay!

18:45: I laughed at the face of Danger, but I stopped out of pity when it started crying. Gave it a pat on the back and it cheered up again.

18:57: Had a moment of silence to honor the remains of a less-than-fortunate hero.

19:35: Noticed a less fortunate hero who looked like he was starving. Left him some money so he could afford a good dinner.

19:52: Someone left a sword in a stone. Wonder when they’ll be back…

Quest #15 Sweep the desert (completed) (100%)

12:46: Jumped through a portal… and reappeared right behind it. Didn’t travel very far, did I?

12:47: Finally! Godville at last!

13:28: Unintentionally stepped on a butterfly. Really hope that the future is not in danger.

19:35: Noticed a less fortunate hero who looked like he was starving. Left him some money so he could afford a good dinner.

14:13: Entered the forgotten woods. I remember this place from my last visit.

14:17: Bathed in the cooling
showers of a tropical rainforest.

19:12: The Chocolate Moose was slain with a clean stab through the heart. I rifled through its robes and found a root of all evil and 8 coins.

00:09: I perished in battle as a true hero. Business Monkey, I’ll be back!

16:52: I’ve seen something that cannot be unseen. Must forget! Must forget! Must forget… Wait, what was that I was trying to forget?

18:33: I was just wondering… As a hero, am I supposed to have a secret identity or something? Oh, and maybe I should get a costume. I’ll look great in tights!

Through the wind, rain, snow, fire and brimstone…

19:32: I feel like I’d be a better hero if I had a personal soundtrack.

Going home…

19:56: Passing by the gates of Los Demonos. I think I’ll drop by for an hour or so.

19:57: Recruits of the “I AM” guild are eligible for free, albeit poor treatment. Oh well, beggars can’t be choosers.

20:17: Suffered from a series of unfortunate events.

04:24: A cute little girl wearing a nekomimi asked me to find the straw that broke the camel’s back. It’s a bit weird, but why not embark upon this quest?

04:29: Did you know, my Lord, that some monsters are edible? They taste like chicken.

16:23: Had a good rest.

16:25: Saw the ghost of a dead hero in my dreams. He was holding a pen and writing in his diary.

Zzz…

16:30: I met a suspicious stranger in the tavern. He mumbled something about a secret religious organization that needed a brave hero who could find the Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything. Here I am!

Quest #21 Find the Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything (0%)

17:32: I found a box labeled ‘cake’, but it was empty. Heartbroken.

17:47: With one clean blow the Glowing Grue was sent on its final journey. I searched the surrounding area and found 34 gold coins and a recursive matryoshka doll.

19:45: A stranger came close to me and whispered: ‘Klaatu barada nikto.’

19:48: Stabbed the Supersonic Hedgehog’s corpse many, many times to make sure it was dead. Yup, it’s dead…and it doesn’t need these 25 gold coins anymore.

“Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About *Censored*” brochure

Aura reviving (7:58)

20:09: Can you hear me, Mighty One? I’m never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down.

20:21: Oh, my aura of reviving seems to have disappeared! I’d really gotten to like it. (he didn’t even use it)

05:48: Hmm… Trollbridge. This place looks familiar. I hope they have a nice tavern here.

10:49: Saw a blue hedgehog run past me at an alarming speed. Must be mating season again…

17:49: Hmm, Godville… I think I’ll drop by for a drink or two.

17:52: A fierce rustling in my backpack ended with an aura of hoarding appearing around me. It’s always good to have light when you travel.

17:58: As I was shopping, a random person came in, walked past the merchant and opened a conveniently located chest. Then, while holding something over his head, he yelled: ‘OBTAINED PHOENIX DOWN!’.

18:32: Found some cake and ate it too.

20:58: I’m back in town! Home sweet home!

10:04: Stepped into a time machine. When I came out, it was a minute later than before. Incredible!

12:03: Finally back in Los Demonos. Ah, smell the fresh… oh, I forgot about the lack of a sewer system in this place.

20:57: Saw a notice on a piece of paper lying by the road: ‘If you notice this notice, you’ll notice that this notice is not worth noticing’. Hmmm.

15:59: The vile Fifth Elephant made an insulting remark about my god. It must pay!

12:32: Another map with an ‘X’ scratched on it! Omnipotent One, why do people insist on vandalising perfectly good maps?

Quest #28 Take a lost kitten to the Temple of Bast (38%)

04:21: Hmm… Trollbridge. This place looks familiar. I hope they have showers here.

Weapon Jedi’s light saber +7

Chrono trigger

04:22: Showed the doctor my “I AM” membership card and got a handful of pills for just 75 coins.

20:32: The lady in the lake kept beckoning me towards her. What a weirdo…

Observing a double rainbow…

18:26: I accidentally stabbed myself with my weapon. Is… is this what I’ve been doing to others?

19:41: Found another hero’s diary. Our entries were frighteningly similar… Great minds think alike, I suppose.

20:23: Waved my “I AM” badge in the surgeon’s face, showing off my guild status, and got patched up for free.

Quest #34 Find more pages for the diary (58%)

Following the yellow brick road…

20:49: Finished off the Titanium Gingerbread Man with a fatal kick to its head and picked up a dragon wheel.

Quest #35 Assassinate the head of the monsters’ labor union (22%)

16:02: As I walked half-starving into a small town, the villagers offered me an ‘I Love Godville’ t-shirt to ward off the monster they’d heard growling in the woods. I didn’t have the heart to tell them that it was just my stomach.

10:17 AM Trained Pinky to strike a fierce and intimidating pose when I yell “Its time for Bobobo world”. Now we’ll really look like a team!

01:37 PM While the Rival Guild Fanboy claimed the moral high ground, I quickly scrambled up the hill and rolled a large boulder down the slope, flattening its false claim. Look, the boulder unearthed an “Apocalypse Herald” newspaper too. Score!

01:37 PM A wandering lawman said that my “Apocalypse Herald” newspaper could shed light on an ongoing monster murder investigation, and confiscated it as evidence.

04:09 AM Found the hero instruction sheet from my original packaging. It just says “Fight, drink, repeat!”

12:19 PM Passed by a small settlement that was being leveled by fire and brimstone. Promptly prayed for those poor townsfolk.

12:26 PM Passed by a smouldering town. I swear Great One, I had nothing to do with that, not this time at least…

02:24 PM Involuntarily kicked the Doctor Whoa to death. Hey, that must be the same reflex as when the doctor tapped my knee! Snatched a vial of side effects and 22 gold coins from its remains… there’s nothing wrong with my loot reflex.

http://godvillegame.com/duels/log/gnjdh

03:14 AM Came across a board game in the forest that was playing itself. Felt an eerie sense of affection for it.

05:05 PM Found a yellow submarine at the seashore yesterday, but it was infested with beetles so I let it be.

08:34 AM Judging by Pinky’s face I think he’s tired of me. I guess it’s time to finally set him free. Farewell, Pinky! I promise to find a new best friend in your memory!

R.I.P pinky the trojan horse

03:18 PM A glowing fairy came along shouting, ‘HEY, LISTEN!’ I swatted it out of the air.

Find the true meaning of Christmas (completed)

09:47 AM It turned out the true meaning of Christmas was stimulating the economy. Weird, I always thought it was sharing.

http://godvillegame.com/duels/log/6t27n

11:27 AM The Holiday ManBearPig transformed into a blue brick, which I immediately threw into the sky. Happy holidays, Omnipotent One!

12:41 PM ‘I am I am expendeble, Its time for Bobobo world Raaaaaaaargh!’ Great One, what do you think? Does it sound impressive?

03:38 PM Came upon a spoon in the road. How odd…

10:55 AM Found a group of pigs guarding stolen eggs. Score! Bacon and eggs for breakfast.

12:14 PM A fellow bar patron promised to teach me the secrets of fools and their gold being soon parted if I bought her drinks all night. Spent 3353 gold coins but had one too many myself and forgot what I learnt.

08:28 AM Fell asleep by the wayside. Woke up with “pray.” sunburned on my forehead.

08:28 AM LA LA LA LA LA! I can’t hear you, Almighty!

08:28 AM Suddenly, I had a splitting headache. My Lord, if you don’t like what I’m doing, just tell me!

08:28 AM A little bird whispered ‘I don’t like what you’re doing.’ to me.

http://godvillegame.com/duels/log/4n9he

03:31 PM Shouted, “I am I am expendeble, member of the “I AM” guild. This drought is over!” just as rain started to pour from the sky. Yep, the townsfolk won’t forget this anytime soon.

Searching for the path of least resistance using an ohmmeter…

I AM Zebak the Fallen Dragon God.Here to bring the Eternal Black Flame to the cold hearts and bring the spark of warmth and Evil to those who accept.Resist and the Flame will consume you.

Those with purity in their hearts shall not be tainted with the embers of sin. We shall band together and freeze your fiery domain and allow peace and ignorance to remain

Thinking about the good old days when he was just a level 1 hero…

12:32 PM Saw a depressed donkey wade into the water with a bubbly yellow bear. I kept walking, afraid the bouncy tiger nearby might decide I look like prey.

Silly old hero

07:34 AM Judging by Scrat’s face I think he’s tired of me. I guess it’s time to finally set him free. Farewell, Scrat! I promise to find a new best friend in your memory!

R.I.P scrat the santa claws

09:54 PM Desperately praying and sacrificing, I made a small miracle and healed my pet’s heavy wounds. Koda, I’m so glad to see you in good health!

10:18 AM Sent Koda on a scouting mission into The Graveyard of the Chosen Ones. He returned with badges for knot-tying and helping people cross the street.

July 14 2014
08:01 PM Carefully placed the last brick, swept all the rooms, opened all doors, and cut the ribbon in a stately manner with my sword. I can’t believe it’s finally happened! After all these months of work, the temple in your name is finished, my Lord! I feel crazy with happiness.

Humming at the resonant frequency of the universe…
I have taught him well.

09:36 PM To celebrate my 1000th visit to the tavern, I received free drinks on the house! I’d better save these 3516 gold coins for another time.

09:55 AM I left the mortally wounded Winged Buffalo to die with dignity, but instead it waved its fist at me and threw a buffalo wing at my head.

11:54 AM The trader saw my brand new bag and started mopping the sweat off his brow. Looking around frantically, he shoved 157 gold coins at me under the counter and hid the thing in the back. Hmmm… Should I report that?

04:07 PM My legs are sore from walking everywhere. Omnipotent One, can you teach me how to teleport? Pretty please?
He knows I can do that? He knows to much…

09:57 AM Arrived at Beerburgh. The corrupt guard at the city gate demanded to see my artifacts so he coul4d extort “taxes” on them. Showed him my weapon instead; he said he was sorry and let me in.

11:32 PM A fully clad but armless knight in black armor challenged me to a duel. What a nut.

01:39 PM Saw a race between a chicken and an egg. The chicken came first.

01:48 PM Just passed by a youngster wearing a shirt saying: “Have you seen this milk carton?”

01:52 PM A wind nymph proved to me that if she blew in one of my ears hard enough air would come out of the other. Mind blown.

12:05 PM Judging by Koda’s face I think he’s tired of me. I guess it’s time to finally set him free. Farewell, Koda! I promise to find a new best friend in your memory!

R.I.P. Koda the solar bear you will be missed

05:51 PM Strutted up to the quest giver and demanded an epic task worthy of my many skills. I must have exaggerated them a bit too much, because now he expects me to realize there is no quest.

Hes just that powerful.

11:52 AM I looked into the kind eyes of the vanquished monster and suddenly decided — Grounded Hog, you’ll be my pet! And I’ll call you Snowy. Bandaged his wounds, gave him a treat and fastened the leash.

09:12 PM Found a corpse of a less fortunate hero. Took his pouch – it’s not like he’s going to need it anyway.

09:16 PM Just found 265 gold coins on one of my old corpses! Sweet!

I guess that counts as a less fortunate hero

10:38 PM Was pursued by a Bearlock yelping frantic mating calls. Can’t believe all the stuff that seems to only happen to me…

First dungeon delve
http://godvillegame.com/duels/log/xww2m

10:52 PM Judging by Snowy’s face I think he’s tired of me. I guess it’s time to finally set him free. Farewell, Snowy! I promise to find a new best friend in your memory!

R.I.P Snowy the grounded hog, I’ll miss you
;( T.T

07:28 PM I looked into the kind eyes of the vanquished monster and suddenly decided — Alpha Centaur, you’ll be my pet! And I’ll call you Toto. Bandaged his wounds, gave him a treat and fastened the leash.

That was fast… it’s only been a few hours…

03:13 PM Life gave me some lemons, but it turns out that it also needs to give me sugar, water, and a pitcher before I can make lemonade. Feeling quite sour now.

09:59 AM Felt lonely. Gave my flawed coping mechanism to a passing stranger in exchange for a hug.
Flawed coping mechanism indeed…

06:47 PM Noticed a “Kick Me” sign taped on the Thesaurus Rex’s back. I followed its instruction to the letter.

06:48 PM While the Thesaurus Rex was busy engraving my epitaph on a tombstone, I taped a “Kick Me” sign on his back and quickly ran away.
Way to keep the chain going my hero

02:12 PM As I trudged through the forest, I met a very fat knight named Sir Cumference. He said he acquired his shape from too much pi.
I guess the equation of his “round” table is 4 π’s ready-to-eat rimshot

07:32 PM Used my “opacity control” skill to teach the Slightly Invisible Man a valuable lesson. I’m not sure what the lesson was, but it didn’t seem to enjoy it much.
The lesson of being slightly less invisible!!!

01:23 PM Judging by Toto’s face I think he’s tired of me. I guess it’s time to finally set him free. Farewell, Toto! I promise to find a new best friend in your memory!
R.I.P. Toto the Alpha Centaur, you will always hold a special place in our hearts. T.T

He got a new pet without me!!

10:03 AM Olwyn ran into a phone booth. He spun around quickly, and was very excited to find himself bigger, stronger and leveled up.

An ark! At last!!
10:07 PM A log! A thousandth log! I’m even ready for a flood now. Not that I’m asking for it, Mighty One.
Finally! My quest to learn a lost language is done. After hearing about how epic I was, I humbly accepted six logs for the ark and a gift-wrapped, triple-sized chunk of experience.

Goodbye Olwyn.. you will be remembered as a hero.
The best Hyper lynx a hero could have.
08:38 AM Judging by Olwyn’s face I think he’s tired of me. I guess it’s time to finally set him free. Farewell, Olwyn! I promise to find a new best friend in your memory!

If this pet likes beer I’m sure they’ll get along just fine. maybe he’ll even keep them alive!
09:58 AM I was just about to defeat the Gummy Wyrm when he pulled out a beer and offered it to me. Hey, I could use a good drinking buddy. Slapped a collar on him and named him Sven. He looks like he’s regretting his choice now.

He’s come so far and become so smart, maybe he’ll get a physics degree before I do!
12:49 PM Well, you take the small-scale, low-mass theory of quantum mechanics and combine it upon itself trillions of times over and the forces constantly build up, eventually meshing perfectly with the large-scale, high-mass theory of relativity. Obviously. I mean, who doesn’t know that?
Somehow I’ve managed to unify quantum mechanics with relativity. Found a chest full of money. Gonna go on a shopping spree.
Future me: as someone who is currently (4-7-2018) in both General Relativity and Quantum Mechanics physics classes I cannot believe he learned that before I did!!!!

02:29 PM Why is it that whenever I think I have a bite, I end up only getting tin cans, old boots or seaweed?
I have the same issue in terraria.

02:35 PM Stared intently at the trader hoping she would give me a discount. She asked me out instead.